Feel Good Without Comparisons

On January 26 I wrote about how I feel good when I don't compare myself to others.  So then, why do I still do it?  For me, there are certain things which I will probably always need to work on and this is one of them.  I think it is part of the human condition.

Right now this relates to creating an art portfolio for someone else's review.  So much to consider when creating something for someone else's critique.  One sizeable consideration is the ever-present question "Am I good enough?"    

The human side of this answer is that we instinctively compare ourselves to others.  For me, it sounds like this:  "I am not as good at drawing as her;" "I don't know how to sculpt at all and others do;" "I am no Monet."

The God*-side however is the side where I feel good because God is not comparing me to others.  "Of course you're not Monet, I already have one of them;" "Look within instead of around you;" and "Don't look at what you're not good at, consider the gifts you do have and put them forth."

My daughter is in the midst of completing college applications and she has about five different essay prompts to respond to.  One of them stumped her because it asked how she was unique.  "I am not the only one who does these clubs, sports and mission camps," she said to me.  But fortunately, one of the admissions representatives solved her problem and my own as well.  She said, "You know how you just told me about yourself; well, that's what you write about in the essay question about what makes you unique.  It's the combination of interests and experiences that you have had which make you unique."

In essence, she said, "Feel good about you.  Do not compare yourself to others.  Consider your gifts and put them forth."

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Now for the reflective questions which you can journal about or if you'd like to share your story, I'd love to hear from you and the community would love to hear from you!  Your comment could have a major impact on someone else; most likely it will be just the right thing at the right time for one of the readers. For me, God* wanted me to know that helping even just one person is wonderfully impactful.

Reflective questions:

1.  Do you compare yourself to others?

2.  If yes, maybe another follow up question is in order:  Who do you compare yourself to?  Why?  What impact has it had or is it having on you?

3.  What does God* want you to know about this (ask directly, God, what do you want me to know?)

* I use the term God as a universal term.  You may decide that Great Spirit, Allah, Higher Power, etc. better suits you today.  It is not for me to decide.

Enough Skin to Go Around

I was at a networking meeting recently and one of the questions each person was asked to answer was this:  "What business advice do you have for the others in the room?"

My answer comes from a marketing club I belonged to years ago with classmates and other alumni from massage school.  What we had in common is that we needed to create a full book of clients for ourselves.  That's when someone said, "There's enough skin to go around."

Think about it.  God* wouldn't call us into something that doesn't have the opportunity for giving us abundant living.  In other words, we don't need to worry about the competition.  We each have something unique to offer.

To the latest group I was with, my response caused a chuckle because no one else there was in the same line of business as me.  But they understood it's meeting:  give your worry the boot, God's got this!
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Now for the reflective questions which you can journal about or if you'd like to share your story, I'd love to hear from you and the community would love to hear from you!  Your comment could have a major impact on someone else; most likely it will be just the right thing at the right time for one of the readers. For me, God* wanted me to know that helping even just one person is wonderfully impactful.

Reflective questions:

1.  What comes to mind from reading this post?

2.  What does God* want you to know about this (ask directly, God, what do you want me to know?)

* I use the term God as a universal term.  You may decide that Great Spirit, Allah, Higher Power, etc. better suits you today.  It is not for me to decide.

+As (a.k.a. Positive Affirmations)

I am a believer in positive affirmations.  I think they can help us to turn the way we look at something around and to get rid of negative brain chatter.  I don't know when positive affirmations took hold in the world of psychology as a healthy practice, but I know that the Saturday Night Live skit of Stuart Smalley debuted over twenty years ago and was created by comedian Al Franken (I am laughing about this skit even now and about the way my brain works too!)

What's new, at least to me, is that instead of using someone else's positive affirmations, I can write my own.  I recommend writing them somewhere, like in a journal, or on a running list, that we can go back to again and again.  Whenever I feel inspired to write a positive affirmation, I put "+A" in my journal so that I can find any positive affirmations readily when I do a "look back" to see where I have been and how far I've come.

Here are a few of mine:

• My physical body supports me.
• The Spirit* is in me.
• I hope for the best for all people.
• God* wants me to have dreams.

Reflective questions:

1.  Do you have a journal?  Why or why not?

2.  What's one positive affirmation that comes to mind for today?

3.  What does God* want you to know about this (ask directly, God, what do you want me to know?)

* I use the term God as a universal term.  You may decide that Great Spirit, Allah, Higher Power, etc. better suits you today.  It is not for me to decide.